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I fought the lawn… and the lawn won

On dumbbells, bulldogs and saber tooth tigers

Filed under: Battle of the Bulge on Wednesday, March 8, 2006

I’ve started working out again.

“Oh good lord,” you say. “Now we’re all gonna be subjected to ‘Woo hoo! My forearm muscles came in! Yay!'”

Come on, can it be that bad? I just don’t understand sentiments like Pat’s:

Blog Resolutions

*I will not start an exercise program and chronicle my progress on my blog. If God Almighty wanted me to run, he would’ve put me in the Stone Age and set a saber tooth tiger after me.

Pat Kirby, Ramblings from the desert

As much as I adore Pat, I’ve gathered two important facts about her from her blog that you should know, namely: 1) She sounds tiny, and 2) I’m pretty sure my bottom outweighs her.

She may be scrappy as all get out and she probably can beat me at arm-wrestling (those artists build biceps like bowling balls!) but I figure I can quiet her down some if I sit on her. There’s no way she’s going to protest if she can’t inhale.

I won’t go into great detail about my workouts, I swear. I’ll just give you a few nonspecifics here and there, like how God Almighty didn’t see fit to send me a saber tooth tiger to help me with my cardio.

He did send me Mojo the Bulldog, though, an offer I resisted until yesterday—when I barricaded Mojo out of my workout space and as a result he almost electrocuted himself. (Electrifying details to follow in the next Monday Morning Mojo.)

So from now on, it’s just Mojo and me, working out, battling those extra pounds together.

Yay.

  1. Yeah! I’ll cheer you on from the corner.

    At least Mojo wants to help.

    Two-toes and Queen B get curl up in their beds and snore while I work out. The won’t play the part of the saber tooth tiger for me either.

    Traitors.

    Oooo.. a new Mojo Monday to look forward too.

    Comment by Kait — 3/8/2006 @ 6:32 am

  2. more power to you!

    My form of excersizing remains the same… chase boy here tickle or spank depending on need… chase another boy there repeat process (kidding kidding – my children rarely get spanked – no CPS thanks)

    Seriously… good for you! I wanted a tread mill, Dh bought me a new computer instead – I ain’t complaining! ;-)

    Comment by Dennie — 3/8/2006 @ 8:13 am

  3. Woohooo! You start and others begin. God knows someone has to start! I’m going to work out too and so I look forward to your updates. Starting is the hard part. Once you get past that, it’s easier.

    Comment by Sissy — 3/8/2006 @ 8:37 am

  4. Darlin’, as long as they are as funny as the rest of your posts, I’d love to hear your chronicles of weight loss.

    I must point out, however, that this little Hispanic is speedy and difficult to catch, negating any weight advantage.

    Comment by pat kirby — 3/8/2006 @ 9:16 am

  5. Good for you…remember the first week is the hard(est). After that, well it’s just hard(er). After that it’s just hard. Like your muscles will be in no time flat. Speaking of flat, that will be your abs….

    Ciao chica – enjoy.

    Teri

    Comment by Teri — 3/8/2006 @ 6:26 pm

  6. Don’t you dare go into how much weight you’ve lost, i will be really pissed off. I mean, i will be happy for you of course…….still, i’ll be pissed!

    Comment by Michelle — 3/8/2006 @ 8:22 pm

  7. My workout today. Turn on treadmill…get on…started walking…reading Forgiving Solomon Long by Chris Wells…got to good part….forgot to walk…you got it, it wasn’t a pretty sight! I’ll try again tomorrow if my knee doesn’t hurt!

    That’s why it’s devoid of sharp objects behind treadmill!

    Oh, my duaghter’s dog is a rottie-beagle mix, with a spring in it’s butt that propels it about five feet in the air….un on the counter…then on top of the frig…and you think you have it bad with Mojo…LOL!

    Comment by Bonnie Calhoun — 3/8/2006 @ 8:27 pm

  8. Okay, Pat, so I’ll up the cardio sprints. It’ll be good for interval training!

    Teri, on my body, “flat” and “abs” are two terms that have been feuding since I was six-years-old.

    Michelle, no details, no worries. I do hope to lose some weight but mainly I wanted to stop feeling so achy all the time and keep my bones strong.

    Also… I tried to catch up at Justitia this morning and Haloscan is messing everything up! Even the main Haloscan site is down.

    Bonnie C: Spring-loaded beagle! Mojo is still earth-bound, so I’ll count my blessings he isn’t a bulldog version of Simon.

    Comment by Bonnie Wren — 3/9/2006 @ 11:06 am

  9. Argh! I feel your pain! The worst thing about a workout is it makes you want to eat everything in sight. Doesn’t that just defeat the purpose. Sigh.

    Comment by missmellifluous — 3/12/2006 @ 2:27 am

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