Prevent unwanted pregnancies: buy an Xbox
Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth I used to have a paying job. Yes, it was a long time ago, but I still remember the parenting advice one of my coworkers offered in case I ever had daughters:
Buy a horse for each girl, and you’ll never have to worry about any of them getting in trouble with boys.
Now that I’ve got some experience raising boys, I’d like to give you the male equivalent of that advice:
Buy an Xbox. End of problem.
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| Before we get down to love, before we get down… I just gotta finish this level… |
I’m not the first one to notice the Xbox’s dampening effect on the reproductive drive, either. An Australian comedy group called Tripod wrote a song about this very phenomenon: “Make You Happy Tonight.”
If you’re an Xbox Widow, wave your lighter and sing along. (Via)
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay, Tripod made it to the US! They’re such wicked boys!
Comment by Michelle — 1/20/2006 @ 3:22 pm
Yea! I was going to say that it works on husbands just as well!
Comment by Bonnie Calhoun — 1/20/2006 @ 9:45 pm
I am a poker widow – poker on the computer – poker at the local bar&grills – sheesh – good thing we arleady have 4 boys – imagine how full my house might be if there was no poker
Comment by Dennie — 1/21/2006 @ 7:02 am
Wah! Dennie! That’s another post altogether:
Bonnie C, you poor thing. Xbox widows, unite!
Michelle, I love their first names: “Scod, Yon and Gatesy.” What songs are they most famous for? What would you recommend I listen to next?
Comment by Bonnie Wren — 1/21/2006 @ 3:23 pm
Piping in for the actual players here:
My darling, loving wife bought me the infernal thing for Christmas a few years ago. She has since regretted this act of generosity. Interestingly, the purchase was made before we were wed; now that we are, and have procreated, anybody want to venture to guess the odds of A) actually getting any time on the ‘box or B) getting an XBox 360?
One word, six syllables: infinitessimal.
Bonnie, GREAT link. LOL’d at work.
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Ken Johnson
Anchorage, AK
…who, thanks to video games and comics, understands the moral and philosophical distiction between real blood and zombie blood.
Comment by Ken Johnson — 1/24/2006 @ 1:05 pm