I dream of cutting and splicing. Of scoring each scene to to such perfection that viewers will weep. Of casually mentioning my latest creation to the Avon lady and hearing her say, “Oh, let me watch it, please?”
I need an intervention.
In the meantime, only my devotion to Super Sabado has dragged me out of my cinema haze into our friendly Mexican restaurant, where chips and guacamole barely soothe the monkey on my back.
If anyone knows of an iMovie Anonymous group that meets locally, let me know, will ya?
A lot of great lines came out of the blogosphere this week. Take a look:
Sorry I haven’t been updating. I’ve been up to me nipples in Vikings.
E. Ann Bardawill of Something Fell, using such pleasantly invigorating imagery that we find we’ve forgotten what she was originally talking about.
One of my clients turned up with pink hair…tits hanging out, and her arse crack showing…..wonderful witness for a rape case!!! Why me????
Michelle of Justitia, reminding us there are one or two situations in life in which invigorating imagery is best left at home.
You wicked homicidal scum, thought Damie, you scuttling scorpion, you creeping worm.
Bernita Harris of An Innocent A-Blog, who wins the “Things We Wish We’d Thought to Say” Contest.
“I am Magneto, you are nothing!” and “X-Men, welcome to die!!”
James Huff of MacManX, who took honorable mention.
… well…a bit of braying bitchy balderdash blathering (did I mention bitchy) barn floor contents … not to put too fine a point on it.
Miss Snark, the Literary Agent, guessing at the terms a proud, marinated cranium might use to describe Her Royal Snarkiness. Sadly, she did not enter the contest.
I think people go to the hospital early because they don’t know what to do with themselves. Maybe I could go out to the rice paddy and pick some rice, or prepare dinner for the farmhands or something.
KJ of Raising Devils, musing on possible pre-labor activities. She hasn’t written since Wednesday, so she’s either still in the rice paddy or has given birth. Let us know, KJ!
“Six weeks later your mom sent me an instant message saying that her operating system was showing signs of unauthorized program activity from a self extracting file which had implanted itself in her BIOS.
The father smiled, “Then nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared and said: **You’ve Got Male’!**”
Bonnie Calhoun of Bonnie Writes, repeating one theory on where babies come from, just in case KJ wants to know.
Today is the day!
Denise Belinda McDonald of Dennie’s Thoughts, on giving birth of another kind.
And why do people (read, men) insist on naming their children after themselves, i.e, John Doe Jr, or John Doe, III? Isn’t it bad enough the poor kid gets your high cholesterol, beady eyes and weak chin?
Pat Kirby of Ramblings from the Desert, waxing personal on how people (read, men) brand said babies.
Snotgreen, blue, black as death, rust: coloured signs. Limits of the diaphane. But he adds: in bodies. Corpus. Then he was aware of them bodies before of them coloured. As I am. How? By knocking my sconce against them, sure.
Missmellifluous of Regaining Paradise, after she plunged into the corrupting influences of James Joyce. Don’t let this happen to you!
…close to you somebody you require leave enough, hold have and you think, request loves must, me are however sad that I then do not request (choral society…) to assign not you to me, me to satisfy can the manner upright, you I love you necken, although you wound me that then I will pack my things now and that to go from the loves damaged, affect the love (x2) damaged to me baby, damaged love damaged the love…
Kait of Kait’s Chaos, not, as we originally feared, under the influence of Joyce. Thank goodness it’s nothing more serious than a mild case of Babelfish.
A lot of talk is made about suicide in case of a full outbreak. Cyanide capsules, hemlock, sleeping pills all seem like a great way to go out on your own terms. While it may be easier to take that final nap (if you do, please do so in a way that destroys your brain), you owe it to humanity to survive.
Chris of the Zombie Squad, on the future of the human race after a zombie outbreak, and sounding suspiciously like Squirt last night at the dinner table, we might add.
I have bid for and won two copies of the same jigsaw. This is because they are both of our home for the last twelve years Avon Cottage. To have a jigsaw of your own home, how cool is that!
Mind you Fran next door at “Thatched Eaves” is the subject of a 1000 piece jigsaw entitled “Cottage, Ibsley” that comes up on eBay about once a month. She must have a four foot high stack of them in her living room.
Mark McLellan of Gullible’s Travels, enjoying one of the more puzzling consequences of living in a cottage several centuries older than the United States of America.
Bottom line: DON’T TAKE YOUR BAD DAY OUT ON YOUR STYLIST.
April of Desperate Writer, reminding us that there are better—not to mention, safer—ways to relieve the tensions brought on by a bad day.
3. Well….let’s just say it involved the dining room table 🙂
Susan of Church of Angst, listing the third sexiest thing she’s ever done, as well as the main reason her guests will be asking if they may dine at her kitchen table, instead.
I really began to wonder about local in-breeding then. Esecially after I turned around. SCARY
Savannah Jordan of “Nothing this pretty could be real,” helping us to remember to always be aware of our surroundings, especially at wrestling matches.
It was my turn to jump up. I said, “I can’t believe you put arugula in the dessert!” Yes, her mini bleu cheesecakes with port reduction sat on a bed of — you guessed it — fresh arugula from her garden. Now, I love Arugula. Honestly, I do. But, enough is enough.
Teri Gray Franta, of Here’s to Happy Women, who had to make toasts to arugula three times before she finally understood its special healing properties. (What a great story, Teri!)
And for those of you who made it through to the very end, here is the sweetest little short about the story behind Star Wars, called George Lucas in Love.. (Thanks, Poke!) It was made in 1999 and I can’t believe I haven’t seen it before!
Those were great. It really helps since Blogger has been acting like a putz for the last day or so! I’m just happy to be able to make a comment and have it take!
Blogger has been possessed and left me banging my head on the edge of desk.
Thanks for the neat links.
Now my Saturday has been made and I can continue beating up the monsters in Diablo 2 while Boy cackles at how his mom is pyro’ing the evil goons.
Must be spring.. brush piles aflame.
Hoppy Saturday. Mexican? Mmmmmm..
Poor Bonnie – but hey … the first step is recongizing you have a problem.
🙂
Dear Bonnie…thank you for the mention and the link. I love that you enjoyed my arugula healing story. I also want to thank you for sharing the other posts every Saturday. Along with yours, I have a growing list of favorites.
Ciao for now chica…
Teri
Love Super Sabadoo!