From this official-looking letter, it looks like Prom attendees will be receiving some really interesting party favors this year.
“Due to the generous donations provided by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, San Dieguito Academy will hearby supply free contraceptive devices at all further dances, beginning with prom 2006.”
“San Dieguito Academy neither promotes nor condemns your student’s sexual activity. Our mission is to support the unique culture and programs of San Dieguito High School Academy. In keeping with this mission, SDA thanks you again for helping us provide a healthy and encouraging environment for your student to grow, learn and succeed.”
Excerpts from prank letter mailed to parents of high school students.
Dang, I wish I’d gotten this letter… it sounds like a classic. I mean, “We neither promote nor condemn your student’s sexual activity” is exactly what you’d expect to hear from a school district nowadays.
And you’ve got to give the kids involved some credit for coming up with a senior prank that’s funny without causing physical damage to the campus, or requiring somebody to clean up a big mess.
The school administration, however, doesn’t see any humor in it at all.
[Principal] Gauthier said the school resource officer, who is a sheriff’s deputy, will investigate the prank.
“To put my name on it – that’s got to be breaking some law,” she said.
At any rate it seems to be a hot story. There were news cameras in the school parking lot when I picked up Tiger; a pretty blonde woman stopped me and asked me if I’d mind answering some questions. I said sure, but when she stuck the microphone into my car window, my brain turned to mush.
REPORTER: So what do you think of this senior prank?
BONNIE: I, um… splork…
CAMERAMAN: (to reporter) Psst! Your microphone isn’t on!
REPORTER: It’s not? (she clicks a switch on the microphone) How about now? Okay! (turns to Bonnie) So! What do you think of this senior prank?
At that point I was greatly relieved—because I had a second chance! This time I was going to put a coherent sentence together, a sentence that would reassure the citizens of San Diego County that at least one parent wasn’t high while driving.
Unfortunately, looking into the business end of a microphone apparently renders me incapable of speech.
BONNIE: I… um, er…. splork!
So if you see a confused-looking parent on the tube tonight, splorking about Prom contraceptives, you’ll know who it is.